"The audience reaction will necessarily be a part of your experience. That's the unsecret secret of the arts: The audience is a part of the whole deal. If they suck, the show can suck." -- Ken Bloom & Josh Wellman, "Attending and Enjoying Concerts: A Student Guide"
Loud Talkers (LTs) are a special brand of annoying because they are completely oblivious to the fact that, uh, there are other people around them who can hear them. To be clear, I'm not talking about people who are enthusiastic with their cheering, or occasionally shout out a song request. I'm talking about the people who spend the entire evening shouting at their friends about anything EXCEPT the show - the cute gal/guy nearby, the latest sportsball game they saw, how totally wasted they are, etc.
Your experience does not need to be ruined by LTs. You can take action and help yourself and others around you enjoy the show.
Why do LTs behave this way?
I believe that there are a few reasons why people talk loudly at shows, and why it's gotten more prevalent in recent years. These are not excuses, just explanations.
1) They're intoxicated. Whether drunk or high, your behavior can become obnoxious, and you probably don't realize it. This is a pretty obvious reason, and I'll cover the whole alcohol at concerts thing in a future post.
2) They don't know the song being played. Yes, of course they should be open-minded enough to listen to something unfamiliar, but sadly, their small brains just cannot handle something they don't already know. I was at a concert recently (David Gray - amazing!) and some idiot yelled "Play something we know!" after David played a bunch of songs from his new album. Guess what? Every single song you've ever heard was new at one time. And guess what else? Other people MAY have heard the song and are actually enjoying it! So enjoy this moment or STFU.
3) Social media creates an quasi-anonymous forum for you to say whatever you want, without repercussion. I don't have proof of this, but I really think that this is why LTs have gotten worse. There have always been hecklers, but I think that many LTs think they can say whatever they want, and have forgotten that they are, in fact, among other people and that being loud is not cool.
4) They're entitled assholes. Along with the social media thing, some LTs think that, since they paid a lot of money for their ticket, so they can behave however they want. Well guess what, so did I. And I didn't pay that much money to listen to you talk to your friends all night about something completely unrelated to what you're seeing. Do you really want to spend an entire day's pay or more and not remember the awesomeness that is happening around you?
Dealing with LTs
So, how do you handle LTs? Your situation will vary, and I encourage you to use your instincts depending on the situation. The most important thing is to not be afraid. Other people are likely pretty annoyed but don't want to cause a scene by saying anything. When you speak up, it will empower others.
1) The first thing you should do assess whether you think the person will respond positively to your politely letting them know that they are too loud. In most situations, the person has no idea that they're infringing on your good time, so it is best to politely let them know. Tell them some variation of, "Could you please speak more softly? I'm having trouble hearing the band." Or, "Would you mind keeping it down? Thanks." In most situations, they will say "I am so sorry" and shut up or move.
2) If they yell at you or are rude, you can decide whether you want to escalate. Tell them that you're all just trying to enjoy the show, and to be cool. You can tell them that you didn't spend all this money to listen to them talk. Enlist the help of others around you if necessary. As I mentioned, most people just don't want to cause problems with the obnoxious person, but if you can outnumber them, you'll be much more successful in getting them to stop.
3) If the situation worsens and they become hostile, do not mess around with them. Find an usher or security guard and let them know what's happening. If someone is so obnoxious that they can't even shut the hell up when asked politely, they could become a bigger issue and security can and should absolutely step in at that point.
4) If YOU are the problem, you're probably not reading this anyway, but please just stop. For real. Stay home and listen to that one song you know and leave us alone.
If you have any suggestions for dealing with Loud Talkers, post a comment! I'd love to hear from you!
